A Testimony: My Deliverance from the Snare of the Fowler

Just four months ago I couldn't even go to the airport, let alone get on a plane. In May I was scheduled to fly to for work. Everything was great. I loved flying … until I boarded the plane. As soon as I stepped onto the plane, I felt something switch in the back of my head - it told me to run. Later I discovered that was my amygdala telling me that I had to “fight or flight.” I boarded the plane, but a panic attack prevented me from staying on the plane. As I panicked I remember seeing the word "trapped" in my mind. I couldn't fly that day. I was embarrassed and upset - again, I love to fly. This was the past, and later Jesus would show me that He is my present and future.

Fast forward to September 22nd, two days before my flight and after several sessions with a counselor and two healing sessions at church. That day I decided I needed to go to church, because I needed something to remind me that God was with me. During the service our Pastor John Fitch came on stage and read an excerpt of Psalm 91, which would end up being the word God chose for me that day:

“He who dwells in the secret place of the most high shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

 I will say of the lord, "He is my refuge and fortress; my God, in Him i will trust."

   Surely, he shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the perilous pestilence.”

Pastor Fitch, expounded: "a fowler is one who traps birds to keep them from flying.” 

What?! In May when I boarded the plane, I saw the word, "trapped, " and I was prevented from flying. Flying also means freedom - just as birds are free when they fly, we are free when we fly as we can travel anywhere on earth in a short amount of time.

In May the fowler came and trapped me; the fowler threatened my freedom, and freedom just so happened to be the theme of that church service on that day.

I was on cloud-nine for the rest of the day, but I still had some obstacles to overcome.

Overcoming by the Blood of the Lamb and by Our Testimony

My next flight was scheduled for the week of September 23rd. Leading up to it I certainly dealt with some anxiety about the flight. However, I felt compelled to share this testimony with others. The day before my trip I went to the chiropractor and told him the story. He was very encouraged, and I was even more encouraged when I felt my anxiety dissolve as I shared my story. The morning of my trip I got a ride to the aiport. Again, I felt like I needed to share my story. The driver introduced himself and right away seemed quite friendly. After the customary pleasantries, he then shared that he was feeling quite well as the day prior he had had a mental health day. Seizing the opportunity, I asked him what a “mental health day” meant to him. He explained, and then I shared my recent moment of overcoming a mental health obstacle. I shared the whole story, from what happened on the plane, at church, and what God was doing my heart. The driver said he felt very encouraged by my story, and that God was speaking directly to him through my story.  Before he finished dropping me off at the airport, I also had the opportunity to pray for him, and we both went our separate ways very edified.  

Again, the ride to the airport was only one step within the story, and I really did need to take each step one at a time. I felt the Lord’s presence with each step, however. This mattered the most to me, because I knew that He was with me, and I was in His will. This very fact actually comforted me so much and drove away the fear that once gripped me. For me, to know that I was in God’s will and that He was with me superseded everything, and this helped me get through security and to my gate with little to know anxiety. Even when I boarded the plane and when I could not help but think about what would happen once I got on the plane, my mind went back to this resting place where I knew that God was with me. Once I reached my seat I did not even feel slightly anxious. As a preventative measure, though, I soaked in worship music and even started writing this account. From take off to landing I felt completely normal. I had done it. I had overcome the snare of the fowler. I was free! 

I still had to overcome in my return trip. This leg home actually really tested me. I was not feeling the greatest when I got to the gate, and I felt myself begin to walk down that road where my chest was tight and it was hard to breathe. I armed myself with prayer and worship music, and even started praying for others on the flight to take my mind off of myself. I boarded the plane, and it got harder to breathe. This was not good, but God got me this far, so I knew He would follow through. The first half hour in the air was hard - I focused on this picture (see below) and listened to worship music, and then I calmed down and my chest and lungs relaxed, and the anxiety melted away again. The rest of the flight was relaxing, and I knew I had overcome yet another hurdle on my journey to becoming free from the fowler. 

The Role of Community in my Healing

In the end as I look at this experience from the other side, I have a feeling that transcends simple relief, which is what I was hoping to feel after making it through the flight. I now see this experience as confirming that being in God’s will is greater than any suffering. I also realized how important community is for our healing. Community was a necessary component to help me overcome - the members of my church who were praying for me, my family, my counselor, my colleagues, and even the guy who drive me to the airport. Without these people I would have not been able fly again. Community is invaluable and crucial in these moments of adversity that we encounter on the various roads we journey.