The Gravity of Righteousness

Image courtesy of chatgpt.com

There is a mighty gravity,

A singularity,

Large it looms.

Inevitable, inescapable, unfathomable - 

A gravity that all-consumes.

Eternity lies at its horizon,

Drawing hungry hearts

and thirsty spirits

to His will.

"So come to the waters,

You who thirst;

And you have no money,

Come, buy and eat."

"All you hunger and thirst

For righteousness

Shall be filled."

Today I beheld a vision of a black hole, and I heard the Spirit of God say Matthew 5:6, “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled.” I understood this in part, but still the overall meaning was abstruse. A black hole is inescapable. Jesus also said that those who hunger and thirst for righteousness will not escape having that hunger be filled and that thirst be quenched. But what does these two things mean? I believe God was showing me that just as nature abhors a vacuum, righteousness (right-standing between God and man or between man and man) also abhors a vacuum, and those who desire it shall receive it. 

If you seek righteousness, know that the only way is through Jesus the Messiah: 

1 Corinthians 5:21 - 

21 For He made Him who knew no sin to be sin for us, that we might become the righteousness of God in Him.

Isaiah 55:1 - 

“Ho! Everyone who thirsts,

Come to the waters;

And you who have no money,

Come, buy and eat.

Yes, come, buy wine and milk

Without money and without price.

Matthew 5:6 -

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,

For they shall be filled.

The Coming of the Light

 

*Image courtesy of goodfreephotos.com 

To gaze at the heavens

To hope for the skies

What do we seek?

What do we hope to find? 

Is there peace or joy or love

Beyond this world,

Looking down on us from above? 

Our hearts yearn

For a tranquility

Like a mist rising from a morning pond,

The hush of snow falling on a winter’s morn,

The din of waves breaking on sea’s edge,

Or the cool breeze on a midsummer’s night

Refreshing our bodies and minds

As we peer into the skies.

There is something more,

The stars sing 

of the glory

And the coming of a king -

One who brought peace, joy and love

And eternal life from above.

So look up 

Sing, sing

of the coming of the light

We want peace. We want love. We want these ethereal things that seem so elusive on earth. From whence do these desires spring forth? From whence do these thoughts prick our hearts? Do they emit from deep within our souls? Are they but shallow thoughts, hoping against hope that there is something more, something beyond this feeble and broken life? Our hearts are grazed by love. Peace passes over our minds. Joy sings a gentle song beyond our sight. Faith stands in our dwellings like an empty fireplace looking at us with a question - what will you do with me? Beauty sings to our souls incredible stories that feel untold. There is a burning, a yearning, a wish that will not go quietly into the night. 

What is peace without a standard? 

What is love without an example, a sacrifice? 

What is joy without singing? 

What is hope without yearning? 

What is faith without trusting in something?

What is beauty without meaning?

What is life without purpose?

*Image source: https://www.goodfreephotos.com/astrophotography/silhouette-of-boy-looking-up-at-the-sky-of-stars.jpg.php

The Art of Letting Things Go: Not My Will, but Yours, be Done

 NOT MY WILL, BUT YOURS, BE DONE

In Matthew, Jesus gave us the key to rest - letting things go. Later, when He faced His imminent death, He gave us a key to help us let things go.

Matthew 11:28-30

28 “Come to me, all who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. 29 Take my toke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”

Luke 22:42 

42 … Saying, “Father, if it is your will, take this cup away from me; nevertheless not my will, but Yours, be done.” 

*Image courtesy of freebibleimages.com

Not my will, but Yours, be done.

Have you ever wrestled with that statement that Jesus made? He instructed us to pray this same thing daily in the Lord’s prayer - “ . . . Let your will be done and your kingdom come, on earth as it is in heaven . . .” It is hard for me to pray this prayer at times. I am sure it is hard for you. Sometimes when I pray it I feel like a fraud. 

Not my will, but Yours, be done.

What do I do if God is telling me I have to sacrifice my time off at work to go feed the poor? 

Not my will, but Yours, be done.

What if God is asking you to face your greatest fear? 

Not your will, but His, be done.

What if God wakes us up at two am asking us to pray? 

Not our will, but His, be done.

Why is it so hard to surrender our wills? Everyone has a will, and has learned from a very young age that if they exert it then they may get what they want. Yet, we often don’t get what we want. In fact, more times than not, although we exert our wills we still don’t get what we want, and we are left disappointed, upset, and sometimes even worse, depressed. 

We simply do not let go of our wills. This is why there is so much suffering in this world. What would the world be like if Vladimir Putin surrendered his will to God? Or Ayatollah Khamenei? Or Benjamin Netanyahu? Or really, any of us? Take a drive through the city during rush hour, and you will see countless wills on display - big trucks bullying their way through traffic, sports cars weaving around others like they were cones on a race track, people flashing their lights, honking, and tailgating. It’s all a display of will. They are all saying, “not anyone else’s will, but my mine, be done this afternoon. I’m more important than everyone else.” Rush hour traffic is just a microchosm of a greater issue - we, humankind, have a systemic problem with surrendering our wills. Yet, in this surrender lies the secret to rest. When Jesus says, “give me your yoke,” He is asking us to surrender our wills. He wouldn’t ask us to do anything that He didn’t do, and that is why all the times his surrendered will was on display were so important - especially in the garden of Gethsemane when He told the Father that He didn’t want to take of the cup, but yet He would still surrender His own will, which He did. He surrendered, and because of what He went through, He did the greatest thing that anyone has ever done in the history of humankind - offered free salvation for all souls, past, present and future. 

I learned an important lesson about letting things go and surrendering my will. This lesson recently cost me $555, but in reality it was probably more valuable than any gold. I had been yearning for a family ski vacation, which entailed renting a cabin or condo, and then those in the family who wanted to ski could spend as much time during the day skiing. I was hoping for a cozy, relaxing getaway with a chance to teach two of my kids how to ski followed by eating delicious food while enjoying gorgeous Colorad mountain backdrops. Sounds amazing, right? I almost got what I wished for. I made the reservations. The plans were in place. We were to visit the week before spring vacation, March 4-6. Then one day in late January I received a call from the resort: “This is *** Resort, and we are calling to check in with you to see if you will still be visiting us January 28-30th.” 

January 28-30th??!! It was January 29th when I received that call. Someone or something made an error, because the reservations I made were for March 4-6. I made that clear to the person, and then was told to call customer service. I did that, and they tried to help me, but ultimately they told me that since I was already into the reservation, I couldn’t reschedule or get a refund. I was positive I reserved March 4-6th, but the resort claimed that I reserved January 28-30th, sending me an email to prove it. I was livid. Not only did I not get my ski vacation, but I was also out $555. I tried disputing it, but in the end God told me to let it go. I am trying to let it go. I do need His help to do it, and I pray for that every day. Why is it so important that I let it go? Firstly, it saves me heartache and possibly the heart problems that come with being angry about things; but most importantly, it recenters me on what is more important, the very thing I try to pray every day:  “ . . . Your Kingdom come and Your will will be done, on earth as it is in heaven . . .”

Not my will, but Yours, be done.

So next time you pray that prayer, don’t think of it as something that cannot be achieved; rather, surrender and trust in God (activate your faith), and see what He can do!

*Image source: https://www.freebibleimages.org/illustrations/gnpi-089-prayer-garden/

A Testimony: My Deliverance from the Snare of the Fowler

Just four months ago I couldn't even go to the airport, let alone get on a plane. In May I was scheduled to fly to for work. Everything was great. I loved flying … until I boarded the plane. As soon as I stepped onto the plane, I felt something switch in the back of my head - it told me to run. Later I discovered that was my amygdala telling me that I had to “fight or flight.” I boarded the plane, but a panic attack prevented me from staying on the plane. As I panicked I remember seeing the word "trapped" in my mind. I couldn't fly that day. I was embarrassed and upset - again, I love to fly. This was the past, and later Jesus would show me that He is my present and future.

Fast forward to September 22nd, two days before my flight and after several sessions with a counselor and two healing sessions at church. That day I decided I needed to go to church, because I needed something to remind me that God was with me. During the service our Pastor John Fitch came on stage and read an excerpt of Psalm 91, which would end up being the word God chose for me that day:

“He who dwells in the secret place of the most high shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.

 I will say of the lord, "He is my refuge and fortress; my God, in Him i will trust."

   Surely, he shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler and from the perilous pestilence.”

Pastor Fitch, expounded: "a fowler is one who traps birds to keep them from flying.” 

What?! In May when I boarded the plane, I saw the word, "trapped, " and I was prevented from flying. Flying also means freedom - just as birds are free when they fly, we are free when we fly as we can travel anywhere on earth in a short amount of time.

In May the fowler came and trapped me; the fowler threatened my freedom, and freedom just so happened to be the theme of that church service on that day.

I was on cloud-nine for the rest of the day, but I still had some obstacles to overcome.

Overcoming by the Blood of the Lamb and by Our Testimony

My next flight was scheduled for the week of September 23rd. Leading up to it I certainly dealt with some anxiety about the flight. However, I felt compelled to share this testimony with others. The day before my trip I went to the chiropractor and told him the story. He was very encouraged, and I was even more encouraged when I felt my anxiety dissolve as I shared my story. The morning of my trip I got a ride to the aiport. Again, I felt like I needed to share my story. The driver introduced himself and right away seemed quite friendly. After the customary pleasantries, he then shared that he was feeling quite well as the day prior he had had a mental health day. Seizing the opportunity, I asked him what a “mental health day” meant to him. He explained, and then I shared my recent moment of overcoming a mental health obstacle. I shared the whole story, from what happened on the plane, at church, and what God was doing my heart. The driver said he felt very encouraged by my story, and that God was speaking directly to him through my story.  Before he finished dropping me off at the airport, I also had the opportunity to pray for him, and we both went our separate ways very edified.  

Again, the ride to the airport was only one step within the story, and I really did need to take each step one at a time. I felt the Lord’s presence with each step, however. This mattered the most to me, because I knew that He was with me, and I was in His will. This very fact actually comforted me so much and drove away the fear that once gripped me. For me, to know that I was in God’s will and that He was with me superseded everything, and this helped me get through security and to my gate with little to know anxiety. Even when I boarded the plane and when I could not help but think about what would happen once I got on the plane, my mind went back to this resting place where I knew that God was with me. Once I reached my seat I did not even feel slightly anxious. As a preventative measure, though, I soaked in worship music and even started writing this account. From take off to landing I felt completely normal. I had done it. I had overcome the snare of the fowler. I was free! 

I still had to overcome in my return trip. This leg home actually really tested me. I was not feeling the greatest when I got to the gate, and I felt myself begin to walk down that road where my chest was tight and it was hard to breathe. I armed myself with prayer and worship music, and even started praying for others on the flight to take my mind off of myself. I boarded the plane, and it got harder to breathe. This was not good, but God got me this far, so I knew He would follow through. The first half hour in the air was hard - I focused on this picture (see below) and listened to worship music, and then I calmed down and my chest and lungs relaxed, and the anxiety melted away again. The rest of the flight was relaxing, and I knew I had overcome yet another hurdle on my journey to becoming free from the fowler. 

The Role of Community in my Healing

In the end as I look at this experience from the other side, I have a feeling that transcends simple relief, which is what I was hoping to feel after making it through the flight. I now see this experience as confirming that being in God’s will is greater than any suffering. I also realized how important community is for our healing. Community was a necessary component to help me overcome - the members of my church who were praying for me, my family, my counselor, my colleagues, and even the guy who drive me to the airport. Without these people I would have not been able fly again. Community is invaluable and crucial in these moments of adversity that we encounter on the various roads we journey. 

Dancing Lights from the Father

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or shadow of turning.

                                                                        James 1:17 NKJV

***

    You  know  that  feeling  when you are sitting next to a window on a sunny day and the warm light flickers upon the walls through tree branches playing in the breeze? I feel like I can stay in that place forever. The warm light to my soul has the sensation of sipping hot soup that warms you to your core. The light flickering with the dancing trees calms and makes my heart sing. Even when I close my eyes and still see the sunlight shimmering through, my mind is carried away to a place soaked in glowing light, inexpressible peace, and flowing perfect love. If life on earth is this good, then there must be a heaven — the light that pierces through my eyelids sings its song. 

                                                        (photo taken near Pearl Lake, Colorado)

I Know Who My Deliverer Is

I Know Who My Deliverer Is

 

A short story about King David.

Image courtesy of chatgpt.com

    Crouching down, I picked up the stone from the riverbed. The stream was cool and refreshing to my feet. This one will do, I thought. I tossed it a few inches in the air to gauge the mass and potential velocity. This one will do just fine. I stood up and looked around. My heart was full. I was so thankful for these peaceful streams and nearby meadows. I recalled all the times I would just sit by the bank of the water and listen to it bubble and babble. Those were the days. God’s presence was so sweet. He refreshed my soul and reminded me how light His Spirit is. I need these times like a deer pants for water. I long to be with Him.

I picked up a few more stones that felt just right and stashed them in my satchel. I’m going to need these stones today, I thought. A notion pricked my heart with fear. I fought the idea of needing these stones to defend myself from certain death. Death is always right around the corner, either roaring at me like a lion or charging me like a bear. I reminded myself – death is certain for all of us, but living with the Most High and powerful God, with His abundant life coursing through my veins, is what I desire.

Never forget how I delivered you time after time.

That thought was not mine. It was a small, still voice that seemed to just devour my fear.

 

I closed my eyes, which started to tear up. My mind then went back to the not so distance past. I could see the rustling in the reeds again. The golden mane gently flowed with the wind, which carried the scent of freshly killed game. Then came the grunts, and quiet roars. Just remembering that sound made my stomach sink and the hairs on my neck stand up. I looked down at the two lost lambs that I had found. I knelt down slowly and gathered any rock I could find. These rocks were not ideal. They were jagged and recently broken off of larger stones, but they were all I had. Bah-ah-ah-ah, bleated one of my foundlings. Shhhh, I put my finger to my mouth and tried to shush the lamb as quietly and calmly as possible. I held its head in my shaking hands. I caressed its side as gently as I could muster. I knew, however, what the bleat of the lamb meant – confronting almost certain death, every man’s fear. Yet I was just a boy looking after his sheep. Why me? Why does this have to happen to me? No one deserves to ever be in a position to be ripped apart by a lion, let alone a poor young boy who is just trying to care for his flock.

I am with you. That was one of the first times I heard this voice so clearly and steadily.

Don’t be afraid! Stand up! Take up a stone and put it in your sling, and when you see those golden eyes, you let the stone go right at the beast!

But what if I miss? I only get one chance! If I miss, that’s it.

I am with you. Trust me.

Yes, I will trust you. Help me trust yo . . .

I didn’t have time to finish the thought. The lion had us in its sights and issued a warning growl. I knew that sound. It meant business. I ushered the lambs behind the tree in some vain attempt to save them. With trembling hands, I grasped the imperfect rocks from my satchel, and placed them in my sling.

I am with you.

I stepped forward. I took another step forward, swinging the sling over my head.

LET IT GO!

I released it, and it careened right off the front of the cat’s face. Blood and fur blotted the blue sky. The beast let forth a high-pitched yelp that I had never heard before and slumped down as if it were drunk. I retrieved another rock from my satchel and took another step forward. This time with more confidence and steadier hands, I placed the rock in the sling and hurled another jagged piece of earth at the beast, tagging it in the head just under its left ear. It screamed and snarled again and then jumped up and half-ran, half-stumbled away. I clenched my fists and released them, and then exhaled. Tears stained my cheeks.

I am your deliverer. I am the Living God. You need fear no living thing.

I trust you, my Lord.

 

I exhaled again as the memory slowly melted away. I wondered if that lion survived. Shaking my head, I reminded myself of the task at hand. This giant, this thing who dares to defy my Deliverer, my King, the Living God of Israel stood tall on the horizon. I looked up at the sky, drew a deep breath, closed my eyes, gently touched the stones in my satchel, and stepped forward.

 

I am with you.

 

 

A Fathers Day Poem

The other day I was holding my 11-month old daughter in my arms, and this realization poured over me:  my ability to hold this little person... this tiny adorable human being was only there by God's grace. I did not earn this ability to hold her. I simply grew into the man I am today, and now I have the strength to hold a 20 pound baby. I guess my point is that I never earned this ability; it was given to me. Ever since our first daughter was born just over nine years ago, I've always had this overwhelming sense of inadequacy. It has just been a lingering thought or question, like, "how am I able to be a father?" So subconscious, I rarely pay much attention to it, but the Lord highlighted that to me in this passing thought, and He reassured me that I have all that I need to be a father. Sure, I have and will continue to make mistakes, but I have the will, the drive, the passion, the spirit (whatever you want to call it) to love, instruct, protect, guide, empower, feed, and provide for my children. God gave that to me when I first saw little Rachel's face. It continued to drive me when I saw little Christian's hand, and today it gives me purpose when I see little Izzy's smile.

I hope that every father out there feels empowered by the simple truth that he is imbued with every grace to be the best father he can be. The following is a poem that inspired me, and I hope it inspires you.

. . . And if you have any doubts about this that ever need to quell, just watch this video - it will remind you that every father naturally has what he needs to be great!

~

Your Arms

Your arms, your strength

They are enough

He gave you His grace

He gives you His love

To lift up your children

Carry them

When they need

To protect, to fight, to provide

To be the one to guard and to feed

So rest, have faith, and you will see

You are adequate

Because He is all you need

Your arms, your strength

They are enough

To embrace

To bring a soft meek touch

You have a father’s heart

He gave you a gift that day

That moment when 

You first saw that little face

You may not know

Or may never have thought

You have a father’s heart

You have enough to play the part

So rest in His grace

And delight in His strength